So, this morning I went for my first session with the personal trainer. OMG. I’m going to hurt. I’m going to be in a world of pain. It will be good, though. But here’s the bad bit: I have to stop drinking. Oh, no. I think that’s where the pain is greatest. I’m a little bit addicted to alcohol. Not in a “I must drink this entire bottle of bubbly and then drink all the other booze in the house and then vomit on my shoes” way, but more of a “OMG it’s 9pm and I’ve been teaching for 5 hours straight: get me a drink someone!” way. It’s going to be bad. I’m going to be wired up, unable to sleep, and probably cranky while I’m on the wagon. Unfortunately I may have to be on the wagon for a long, long time.
This whole goal setting thing is virtuous, but it is hard. It’s expensive, too. But it’s worth it, I think. I’m tired of feeling tired, of feeling overweight and spongy, and of not fitting into my clothes. Time to make a change. The trainers I went to also sell supplements in the front of their studio, and when I was there I only saw men, which made me a bit nervous because the website was clearly geared towards both sexes.
Luckily, some girls wandered in to do their workouts and the sex balance evened out somewhat. The lads at the fitness studio were very buff, and rather gorgeous. Some light flirting going on, but I think they’re gay. Which is absolutely okay, and better for me and my jealous (in a good way) husband if they are. I heard some light sibilance, and some ever so gentle tizzying in a not-manly way. I prefer it like this, because I can flirt outrageously and there’s no sexual tension AT ALL, considering they’re going to hear me grunt and see me sweat and hear me swear at them. There was lots of laughing and I fell immediately into my old habits in this environment, which the main guy Bailey seemed to enjoy, and he lifted to match, teasing me lightly as I gave him the “I can’t believe you just made me do this” face. I’m a bit loud, a bit bright, and very cheerful in these scenarios, because that’s my happy place behaviour.
So, this exercise studio has this neat app called MyFitnessPal, which is an online health and fitness program. It is very cool. It has a food diary section, and automatically calculates your calorie intake for the day. My calorie intake for me at rest, to maintain size and current weight, is 1476 C per day. That’s not a huge amount, and even with one Vegemite muffin and a black coffee for breakfast, and a tuna salad and black coffee for lunch, I’ve nearly hit my protein intake for the day. I’m not sure how I’m going to meet my calorie intake without adding some extra protein, but the boys at the studio tell me not to worry about that. They’ve already added a comment about my progress so far, which is rather dedicated of them. I have to add in all my exercises for the day, and while the learning curve is a little high right now, it will get much faster as I add food products as I eat them, saving it to an online, automatic bank of my most eaten foods.
So, I was rather shocked (but not really) at my measurements, and at the way 2 kilos recently attached itself to my body without any help from me. Well, maybe a little bit of help. I’ve been eating poorly, and drinking too much, and generally enjoying life WAY too much of late. When we came back from Greece I’d added some weight, which was unexpected, because normally when we travel I lose weight, because we walk everywhere. Of course, it was 41 degrees Celsius most days there, and too bloody hot to walk anywhere. So no walking, way too much good eating, and 2 months later I have to pay to have fat removed from my body, the hard way. I suspected I was getting heavier because all my old clothes, the ones that I bought recently, don’t fit me very well at the moment.
So, online, ambition and sloth laid bare, here ’tis. I’m 75kgs. OMG. Where did those extra 15 kilos come from? I used to be 57kgs and depressed because I thought I was too large. Now, 57 kilos feels like an unattainable fantasy. But I used to be that, so I reckon I can get there again – well, close to that. I’d be happy to reach 60 kgs. That’s my goal weight for March 2013. So, 15 kgs in 6 months? Yep, I think I can do it. I’ve lost 7 kgs before in 3 months, so I know I can do this. Of course, getting older with a metabolism that keeps slowing down is a bitch, but I’m determined to succeed (like the song says).
So, as I head off to do my daily walk round the block (think of this as training for when I have a dog again), I say to you all, I’ll be back. With less of me, I hope.