The downside of time

Time moves on, we say. Time changes everything. Time is a healer. Time after time. Time is on our side. I’m struggling with a couple of things today. The first is that my 18 year old son decided he is going to return to Melbourne in late November to live. No starting a trade up here or even attending Tafe. No: he is going back to Melbourne to live with his useless and unemployable father. He will get a rude shock, I think. For one, there is not enough room for him in the flat, for another, his father will make him get a job straight away to support the family. Time marches on and my little boy is eighteen and a man and capable of making his own decisions about life. Can’t say I like it though. And I will miss him.

The other thing I’m not enjoying at present is wasting time. I did plenty of that on the weekend and I’m finding that I’m dragging myself down as a result. I’m starting to miss working on the weekend and I’m struggling to focus during the week. Again. Time marches on and my study is marching away from me! Hard.

The third thing I am discovering is that my husband is not as fit and hale as I would like. Something to do with his prostate being huge and causing him pain. I’m angry and confused about it. I don’t know who to talk to and I fear for him, and us. Time is telling in this instance – my darling man has showed progressive signs of ill health over the last year and even though he seems fine on the outside, I worry about his insides. Time is a traveler. I’m not sure if time’s on our side.

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